That’ll Teach Me to Cheat

I’ve quickly been sucked into another Jodi Picoult book and have been looking forward to the kids’ “quiet time” all day to dive back into it. We do Emily’s quiet time routine first, and after reading Goodnight Moon, her pick, I quickly looked down to the growing pile of books next to the rocking chair to pick her second read. One book will never do. It’s always two. Knowing that Trixie and her fate awaited in my book’s unread pages, I quickly grabbed what I thought would be a quick second read for Emily, Snappy Little Bugs. A pop-up book with few words and even fewer pages. Perfect. The second I opened it however I remembered why this book can

S      T      R      E      T      C      H 

out for an eternity! Emily has to kiss each and every bug on each page. And I’m not talking a speedy kiss on each page. It’s a deliberate kiss, a pull back, a look at the next bug, then a kiss, another pull back, another deciding look, etc. It’s a very. slow. process. And don’t try to turn the page before she’s done! Oh, no! She wants to be fair to all the bugs on the pages. Each one deserves a kiss.

Eight butterflies…kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss.

One snail…kiss.

One worm…ewe, no kiss for that one.

Two dragonflies…kiss, kiss.

One caterpillar…kiss. 

One beetle…kiss.

One spider…kiss (yeah, this one surprised me too!). 

Three ladybugs playing hide-and-seek…kiss (guess the other two were hiding pretty well).

Holy spaghetti monster, HOW many bees is that? Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss…

Three grasshoppers…chomp, chomp, chomp. Guess those looked tasty!

OK, that’s one lesson to file under why cheating never pays. Sweet dreams, Emily. Now where’s my book!?