Tonight Susanne had a hot date with one of her lesbian friends. Who am I to say no when she asks if I mind. Seriously. I should probably stop writing right now. Maybe I should just post once a week about my wife visiting this hot friend, hanging out with this hot group of moms. Maybe I could generate more traffic with a little creative writing about my wife and hot lesbians. Hmm. Something to think about.
So it's going to be just me and the kids and they are begging and pleading to go with her. Tonight as far as the kids are concerned I am chopped liver dipped in creamed earthworm with a side of blue cheese. Seriously. You would think Susanne told them that as soon as she left that I was going to make them watch 60 Minutes. They REALLY wanted to go with mommy tonight. But I had little something up my sleeve.
Braedyn & Emily (almost in tears): I want to go with mommeeeeee!!!
Me: Hey, you guys want to play video games?
Braedyn & Emily: YAAAYYYYYY. Bye mommy.
Score: Dad 1, Mommy 0
I wrangled em up and headed to the game room. I left Koko and Charmin outside because it's hard enough to manage two toddlers and wired console controllers without the joy of dogs dragging the Xbox and Playstation out of the entertainment center.
The kids played for a bit until Dad got tired of “helping”. “My car is stuck", “this is hard”, “can you help me”. Looky there, the time is up. Did you hear the timer? I did. Time to turn it off. Let's go play outside.
Ahhh, peace and quiet. The children are turning the swimming pool into the largest mudbog west of Lake Lahonton and I get to work on the blog. But wait, where is Koko? “Koko, come girl”. I can hear her whining and barking around the corner. Must be something keeping her entertained.
After a few minutes I am surprised she has not come to see me or the kids (she loves to get wet with the kids). I am still being a lazy motha because work has been really tough lately. Nuff said. Who wants to get fired about writing about work (don’t want to get Dooced!)
So I start yelling for Koko, because my lazy ass is NOT getting out of the rocker unless one of the kids falls into the pool face down…and doesn’t get up right away of their own accord. I look over at the fence and whose head do I see poking out from under the fence? Koko’s. From outside the yard! Somehow she managed to escape, and now she is trying to get back in. Apparently I am not as much a motivator as whatever cute poodle she was chasing on her way out because I had to open the gate to let her in.
Guess I am putting wire up this week.